update on therapy

S has been getting ABA for six months now. Looking back, it seems like he has not made much progress although his therapists seem to think that he has.I am not so concerned about spoken language etc because it is too much to expect but I was expecting the eye contact and the joint attention to get a little better but it has not.That was my six month goal for S.. eye contact and joint attention.So for the past month, we have been doing DIR/floortime with him and it adds up to about 20 min daily .. that's all.On top of that we started the B 12 shot.I dont know if it is in my head or it is real but both my husband and my are seeing that S is more affectionate, playful, a little more eye contact.No we are not seeing a normal child or a child whose "language is exploding " etc etc but definately something good.He is able to do matching, simple puzzles but his receptive language is completely absent, he has no clue about language or meanings of words. His joint attention and inablity to understand very simple spoken language is what scrares me the most.The min I start getting the slightest clue that he does understand stuff, I can get some positivity back.
So, I contacted our county and there are some agencies offering DIR services but the problem is that they cannot give us 18 hours. they can give us only 10 hours of therapy.That is no good.The philosophy of these agencies is" coaching parents" and that parents are the backbone of DIR.What that means is that both parents cannot be working 100%.The providers will come and coach and play with the child and give tips for the parents on how to interact with your child.
I have been trying to tell my husband this... how can we go on like this with both of us working. It is a very difficult topic at home.I would love to stay home but our green card is through my application and so I have to keep working, on the other hand, he just got done with school and is now wanting to do something with his career but ...he is willing to do anything for S .. but I am frustated because, even if he is home he is not going to be as good as me? Is he really going to practice all the tips that they are going to teach him to do?Even now on several days, we argue about basic things, like" dont treat him like a patient" or "dont try to tell me how I should play with my son" or " nothing is wrong with him," or " he will be fine"I am really confused, should I continue ABA with a touch of DRA for 22 hours a week or should I move to a pure DIR based program for under 10 hours a week with the risk that S is going to be facing the wall for the rest of time.