Bad day

Well today I was on vacation. S has been sick now for two weeks, what started out as a virus of some kind then became a ear infection and while that started getting better, we now have diarrhea which is bad.Meanwhile his once great appetite, is reduced to zero and we are having to slowly work upwards in regards to that. As if that was not hard enough, he is not able to participate in ABA to his full potential. He was spacy and lost and did not do most of the things that he normally does.The providers were being kind to me and said that of course he is sick and he is not eating and not sleeping ... how would you feel?
Alright.

Then in the afternoon, the ABA trainer, I guess she is the equivalent of the BCBA and the program coordinater met with me to discuss how the ABA program is going and how we should move on.
I am just soaking in the negativity from that woman.She is really sweet and nice person but all the observations she made about S made me feel scared, sad and negative.
She pointed out the several several skills that he lacks, motor planning was poor, visual? and auditory processing delays and poor imitation skills. that is a triple whammy she said and may take a long time.
The whole discussion started with me saying that he is able to do the puzzles, the simple ones where you fit pieces in the slots, and where you need to match the pictures but he is not able to move ahead with the matching program that they started last months.
They put three pictures of objects in front of him... like flash cards. fish, hot dog and pizza and he is given the picture of the pizza flash card and the expectation is that he puts it on top of the pizza card. Well, S really does not care and puts it whereever he wants.
From this, she went on to point that, maybe he has a visual problem, may be motor planning, may be he is just not ready yet etc etc.
I did not like anything she was saying.
I was specically asking her how to pecs and our photos in everyday life especially because S can point and sign want or more for objects he desires.
I really did not get some good ideas.
She just threw around some ideas for pecs which are so bookish and they have not worked for us yet.S just prefers to drag us to whereever he wants to go and show us what he wants.
As far as receptive language, we dont know how much he knows and we wont unless, we start a receptive language/labelling program, such as touch this.
I have to think more about this.
he is getting about 20 hours right now. and I want to come up with a imitation and receptive language program for daycare and myself and the whole thing will take about 10 min I think daily.
Anyway, I was so positive and feeling so good and enjoying my baby for four days even though he was sick and I was sick but all this jargon about the delays he has, etc made me sad again today. I cried after a long time.
Of course, who elese can I share my desparation and sadness with? My poor husband who is trying so hard not to get any negative emotions and be positive.
He is by nature much more positive than I am and today, I saw that he was a little worried.

tomorrow is a new day and I will keep doing this.
We took a long bath in the bath tub and S enjoyed this.
I also felt guilty at not spending time with big sister D.Poor baby.More negativity.